One year on ....

It's difficult to describe how I feel one year on. Mark still in hospital and our life seems in limbo. Sometimes it seems the last year has passed in a blink of an eye, sometimes it seems like our life has always been like this. We're nearly owners of a house again, and nearly not owners of a boat, both fairly major things but in comparison with Marks health and rehab, it's so minor. I watch life going on around me and wonder when ours will start again. We had a visit from an SIA peer support person when Mark first moved to Pinderfields. One of the first things he said was ... it would be two years before we start moving on with our lives ... I was shocked and taken aback. One year on and I now understand exactly what he was saying, but it was hard to take that in at the time.

Over this last week, he has thankfully shown some improvement and is having less bouts of the really serious pain. At the same time his consultant at Pinderfields and the Registrar at BRI have pushed him to see the pain team again and see a Psychologist. They think it's all in his head. So he's seen the pain team had some of his meds changed, it's not evident that they've made any difference yet, he's also spent time with the Psychologist. After an hour with her she said it was evident he doesn't need a Psychologist, whatever was wrong with him it wasn't in his head. So he's jumped through all their hoops, but because they've decided there's nothing more they can do for him so they're sending him home. We're both very tired of trying to fight the system. It's down to me now to look after him, no-one is interested in trying to get to the bottom of the problem.

He has got up in his wheelchair today, a move forward thankfully and now the Physio at BRI is trying to get his new chair to make sure it's right for him. Clearly the support provided by his chair is going to play an important part in not aggravating whatever is wrong in his back. We've come to realise the majority of the people we have met in this journey of Marks rehab are of VERY average intelligence and it's seriously hard work dealing with them.