Mark and I are parted for a week - go to Greece to pack up our boat

It's been over a week since my last blog, leaving Mark for a week was quite a wrench for both of us, we've spent more of less 24 hours a day together for the last 4 years and been through this life changing trauma together. His week without me started off with a sore throat and a slight cold. He had an x-ray to ensure his chest was clear and thankfully it was so didn't need any medication for that and managed with strepsils for his throat. He also began a regular program of catheterisation to slowly bring his bladder to as normal a function as possible. One of the problems they have discovered is that fluid is settling in his legs during the day instead of going through his kidneys then into the bladder, so he is passing very little water during the day and loads through the night. To deal with this he has been measured up for full leg compression stockings. Time for me to get in the suspender belt I think! It will take about a month before we know how successful that will be.

He had an afternoon with a group from Back Up - www.backuptrust.org.uk/Home This is a fabulous organisation who help hundreds of spinally injured people every year through mentoring and courses to learn how to make their life easier at home, as well as developing independence and self-esteem, the afternoon noticably improved his wheelchair skills. Part of his Occupational Therapy sessions are now spent in his room, dressing, getting his own things out of his locker to use in the bathroom and generally becoming more independent. His gym sessions continue to work on his transferring skills, he is about 80% along the way to being able to transfer from bed to chair. It doesn't sound much when written quickly but it's a enormous step forward and takes huge amounts of effort and determination on Marks part to achieve. He also had a session in a standing frame towards the end of the week. He said it felt really weird but it's good for circulation, bladder and bowel health and general well being, it's a piece of equipment he will have to consider when we eventually get settled in a new home.

Just before I left they had given Mark a neoprene corset which is supposed to help with blood pressure. It is continually making his abdomin muscles spasm which is beneficial in improving his blood pressure and therefore enabling him to stay in his chair longer, but it has the downside of being uncomfortable due to the feeling he's having a constant workout. An unexpected benefit is that it helps him return to an upright sitting position much easier when he has been leaning forward. So far it is helping with his blood pressure.

Having left Mark for a week I expected to see quite a difference in him when I got back. However the changes now are much more subtle. His hands are losing their shakiness and slowly looking much more normal, albeit still a long way to go in regaining strength. The improvement in his wheelchair skills although minimal is significant. His moral however is not brilliant. He can't be 'up' all the time, we understand that but I fear he is becoming more institutionalised and that leads to being more inward looking. Again perhaps perfectly natural but not healthy. He spent alot of time over the last week reading about and researching spinal injuries and maybe now we're moving into that phase when we begin to realise just how difficult it is going to be rebuilding a life. The physical improvements continue in a mostly forward direction. The physcological and emotional aspect is another matter entirely. Mark now has his own laptop so if anyone feels inclined to send him an email, I think it will help to know he has so much support out there - please DON'T inundate him with jokes or put him on your joke distribution list and don't always expect an answer - markwycherley@hotmail.com

Finally, a huge thanks to our friends in Greece, the time and effort you have put into supporting us, not just emotionally but financially is overwhelming. Face to face I have tried and failed to really find the words to express our thanks and to explain just how much it means to have your support. Now that I try to write it, is equally difficult. Faced with such a life changing event, you find out just how important friends are - not just today, but tomorrow and the day after, the week after and the months after that. Although we don't have the same day to day contact, I think about you all daily and hope you continue to support each other as we travel this journey together.